"There was an old lady who lived in a shoe . . . "

As the nursery rhyme goes, "There was an old lady who lived in a shoe . . . " Looks like Fritzina the lizard has become a regular in Judie's yard shoes. Judie has two pair of shoes that a positioned near the back patio door. They sit off the ground on a rack about four inches in the air. The shoes are black, one set is water proof, the other ones are leather.

In the morning, the morning sun reaches those shoes and being black, they must warm up pretty fast. So it becomes a perfect hiding place of the lizards. It provides protection from their enemies and provides early morning heat which they need. And the shoes are close to the ground but not too high and in their turf. Perhaps they are shoe lizards now.

We have discovered that they sneak in around sunset and get way up into the shoe. They locate well up into the toe area and you can not see them unless you use a flashlight to closely examine the interior of the shoes.

This prevents Judie from early morning forays into the yard. But since she is not an early riser like me, it does not make much of a difference. But sometimes late at night she does foray into the yard and now must check first or she will be startled by the critters in her shoes. I am not sure she is plesed by this but she seems tolerant of it all.

For sure there will be no scropions or crickets in her shoes. Fritz will take care of that for her.

Interestingly, we have two lizards that have chosen her shoes. We believe one is the off spring of the other one. Fritzina is pretty big for her ilk and the othe one is quite a bit smaller. This is Frizina's second year with us.

No matter, we like to see the little critters have chosen to live with us. They seem to be more tolerant of us. We do not startle them, or at least they are not prone to run away if we get too close.

We have seen a little Friz's roaming around out front. And we have seen the medium size Fritz go to the front yard via the driveway/garage area. In fact, I have seen them foraging inside the garage. Naturally, I do not have any crickets, or at least I do not have them for long as visitors in my garage.

I am thinking we must not have any snakes either. That is probably the lizards greatest enemy. That and hawks but we do not seen to have many hawks visit us. The Mississippi Kites that return from South America don't seem to get down and dirty with us either. So I expect we will have our Fritzes for a long time to come.

And that is a good thing.

The Benjamin Incident . . .

As a youngster in New Roads, I asked for and got a Benjamin Air Rifle (they still make them). All the boys my age generally had such a gun and we roved the town hunting and shooting. We shot at song birds, tin cans, ducks in the lake, fence postsm well you get it we went around shooting. That was acceptable male child behavior in the deep south.

The incident occurred when I shot myself in the foot, one of my toes actually. I was at Tommy Jewel's house (alas, Tommy a couple of years older than me is now pasted on) and we were talking. I used my air rifle as a sort of prop and leaned on the stock with the end of the barrel on top of my shoe. My shoe as I recalled was a leather loafer of sorts.

Well in the conversation as with small boys things got exciting. I had forgotten the gun was loaded, it was a .177 pellet gun. And I pulled the trigger. Pop, there was a hole in the top of my shoe and I removed the shoe and the sock and found it had gone into the side of my toe.

Well, I rushed home (three houses over from our house) and we went to the Doctor and he looked at it and then removed it. He said, "Don't do that again." I did not even get a stitch. I did not have limp. I got a band aid. My wound was superficial and I don't even have a scar. All I could show for it was a small hole in the top of my shoe which I continued to use.

Well as you can imagine word got around town about Chip's stupid act. I am sure it was a great laugh. The preverbial "he really did shoot himself in the foot" kind of thing.

Turns out one of my buddies at the opposite end of town, known as the Morning Side (East end of town) was demonstrating my stupid act to his buddies. He showed how I had placed the gun on top of my shoe and leaned on it. And then the pulled the trigger. Guess what, he shot himself in the foot.

So stupid old Chip had the last laugh.

Today, you can not shoot anything in the city limits. No fire works, no air rifles, no .22 rim fire rifles, no shot guns, nothing, nada. How times have changed. From brandishing guns to required helmets for bicycle riding. What a bunch of wimps. Times have changed, for the better maybe, for the worst, for sure. I ain't no fun anymore.

"Do you have . . . "

Do you have these kinds of moments? I do, probably my old cranky age causing it all but it drives me nuts.

I get all my medications via a mail order pharmacy. As a military retiree, I can use Express Scripts and get supplied a 90 day supply of my prescribed medicines. I have a number of them. And I get very reasonable prices, mail free but have to put up with a sort mass production kind of operation. Express Scripts is the largest of its kind, so not much competition. And it is the only military sourced mail order house for medications.

I have had dropped prescriptions, ignored prescriptions, but never a wrong prescription. They began pushing automatic renewals which I thought was a good deal only to find out that I had reinitiate the automatic service with each renewed prescription. I guess they could not figure out renewal versus new prescription, pretty dumb, huh? That caused me a problem.

Today I got a telephone call, an auto telephone call, not a real person. The call was to say three of my presciptions needed to be renewed. What Express Scripts failed to say was the current presciption was still good until the end of May of this year and this was the last resupply on the current prescription. So the communication left me up in the air. Considering the source and past performance I immediately called them on their 800 number (well really it is an 877 number but you know what I mean).

Well I got the usual auto menu deal. First say your name, then your birthday. The auto reply says they recognize the phone number and give me a menu that has absolutely nothing do with what I want to talk about. After several button pushes resulting in several layers of irrevelant menus, I pressed and held the "Operator" or "0" button on the phone and got a connection to a "customer advocate." I have learned from experience to go for the operator button and you will get a real live person to deal with. Why can't they do that to begin with.ive person?

As you can imagine it is at last a live person. We discussed the call and what it really means or did not say. Turns out my prescriptions are all okay, they expire in late May (which I knew to be a fact). So I asked why was not the remaining other four prescirptions due to expire in May were not also mentioned. No reply, no answer except to say "we apologize" meaning we do not have a clue as to why it occurred that way. Makes you wonder doesn't it, these people are dealing with life issues like medical prescriptions and can only get it half right. Makes you wonder that what you get in a bottle may not be what you really need. Their credibility sits on the edge all the time.

Well it turns out my auto resupply kicks off on the 26th of April, today being the 24th of April. That's okay. One prescription of Bayer Test Strips that are used to measure my blood glucose was due to be renewed on May 6th. I pointed out the reason that date appeared is because Express Scripts did not have them in stock at the appropriate time for the last resupply cycle and shipped them late. The advocate moved that resupply date up concurr with the April 26th date.

So now I can expect one package of all my prescribe medications in the mail. And, yes it is about time to go see my personal physician for my annual look see. I can not call it annual check up since that is not covered by Medicare, you get one physical examination when you go on Medicare, so I do not know how the Doctor sends in this for his fees but he seems to know how to do that. So I will get poked and punched, pricked and tested once again and all my medications will get renewed. And I will send them off to Express Scripts and start the cycle all over again,

Fritzina is Back . . .

Fritzina is the name given to our fench lizard that lives in and around our back patio. It is a haven for insects and Fritzina's favorite food are crickets. Needless to say, we have few crickets around. She ranges far and wide, I have seen her scourering around in my garage (lots of insects in there) and she likes to climb the Hackberry tree next to the main bedroom/bath part of the house.

Not sure of the attraction of the tree but it has got to be food. They are dependent on insects for their livelyhood. No food, no lizards.

"22 Rifle . . ."

Recently in a visit back home, I acquired the family .22 single shot rifle. I did a little research, it is a Springfield Arms gun. Springfield Arms is a common name but appears in the late 1920s to early 1930s. I am pretty sure Sears and Roebuck sold the guns. So I concluded the gun originally belonged to Uncle Ham. Joe Morrison, one of Uncle Ham's children gave me the gun.

When I first used the gun, it was at our house in New Roads. It was in the back closet and apparently John Jr. had used it a lot. The cocking mechanism had failed and somebody, John probably, had used some wire to devise a way to cock the gun. It did not take much pull to cock it.

I must have shot a thousand rounds through that gun at Poule Deaus, water ducks, in False River behind the house. No matter that people lived on the other side of the lake, but in those days there were not a lot of camps on the other side as there are today. Nor were there many boats and water skiers. There just were not that many people around in those days. I am sure today people would be shocked at someone shooting a .22 on False River. And in fact it is against a city ordinance to shoot a gun inside New Roads city limits. Not sure the parish authorities have caught up that kind of gun control yet, too many hunters in and around the country side.

We thought nothing of doing that as kids. We roamed around with our Benjamin air rifles, .22s and later shot guns across the country side. Our parents did not see any harm in it either. They are the ones that gave me the Benjamin air rifle. And Red Rider Daisy BB gun before that. That was life in small town rural America.

I fired that gun until the wire gave up and I could not cock it anymore. Back into the closet the gun went.

It seems John Jr, my older brother now long deceased, retrieved the gun and had Stienberg's in Baton Rouge repair it. The parts are common enough, I did a web search and found them. Anybody could have done it with ease. The little rifle sits in my closet now days. Stienberg's is no longer in existence; the Lipsky family, the owners of Stienberg's, are probably one of the nations largest gun importers. They only sell wholesale now days to other gun dealers. Baton Rouge's oldest and best sports store is but a memory now days replaced by Cabelas or other mega outdoor fitter stores. And Joe Lipsky sells to them.

Yes, I bought a box of 50 rounds at Walmart but I have no where to shoot the rifle. It is just another family heirloom, not of great value except to us. Perhaps sometime in the future I will return gun to the plantation where it really belongs.

"First Fish Out of False River . . ."

Do you remember catching your first fish? I do. It was quite memorable for me, a little boy.

Our neighbor a couple of house over, had a fishing pier, well really a pier to support his boat house (and boat).

But on cane pole with my trusty bobber, and a big fat worm I was after it. Others were out there but I do not recall who it was but there was at least one adult. We were after sun fish, Chincapins or we called them perch. Quite delicious fried up but you had to catch a ton of them to get enough to eat. And they were kind of bony too but they are worth it.

Not satisfied as I was not catching anything I switched to a different location on the other side away from all the others (who were catching fish, not me~!). All of a sudden my float went under and I yanked real hard. Then I knew I had something big on the line. I yelled for help (and advice on what to do now that I had caught one). I got help right of way and after fighting the fish for a while, we decided (at least the mentor decided) it was too big to just pull in up in the air.

So we dragged it along the pier and got on the river bank and pulled it in. It was about a five pound Cat fish. A big one. Really big for me.

Took up the hill and my father was home. He skinned it and we ate it the next day. It was Friday and in those days good Catholics ate fish on Friday. Normally we my mother would have gone to the fish market to get Cat fish but not this go round. It was enough to feed four of us, two adults and my sister and me. My older brother ws off to boarding school in Indiana (and he misssed out on all the doings).

Great story, that must have been around 1949 or so. Long time ago but who could forget catching a monster in False River. And I did not ever catch another Cat fish again.

"Six Degrees of Freedom . . ."

I was struck by that adage of we are all connected by six degrees of freedom.

My usual morning ritual is to work the crossword puzzles in both USA Today and The Washington Post. I stumbled upon a artcle about studios and home featuring James Carville, etal and Cokie Roberts etal.

Six degrees of freedom you say, well James Carville of Carville, Louisiana located just below Baton Rouge in Iberville Parish was the home of the only Leprosy Hospital in the continental US and the of course the Carvilles'. How do I know that, well my exbrother-in-law, George Raymond Nickie" Neck mother was a sister to James' mother. So we at one time occasionally visit the Carville estate for family doings. So that is my connection to James Carville.

Cokie Roberts nee Boggs is my second cousin. Her mother, Corrine "Lindy" Boggs is my first cousin and fairly close to my family. Both Lindy, a famous person in her own right (Retired US Congress Woman and former Ambassador to the Vatican) and Cokie abide in the Cokie Roberts household this day and age.

On rare occasions I Email Cokie but never ever do the same to James Carville. He is just a conversational piece to me. I saw him but once that I can remember and that was at Nickie's funeral some few years back. He and Nickie have a vague but recognizable resemblance. Nickie however was a big man and James is rather smaller in statue but they had similar large egos.

Family is a grand thing. You never know just how far apart we all are. Family is not all blood relations but more often personal relations from our childhood or other close encounters. Kissing cousins, near cousins, almost cousins, employees, fraternity brothers, etc.

The community I grew up in has a relatively ancient in history, more so that similar small towns. The locality began recording legal notices in 1771. That predates the Revolutionary War. Indeed a relative, albeit distant, is my wife's patriot that allows her to be a member of the Daughters the American Revolution. That patriot fought in the only revolutionary battle that occured out side of the original 13 colonies and it was in Louisiana. Few people know that (or care about it) but it is a significant piece of trivia and a muse of history.

I had occasion to retype my mother's book, Early Marriages of Pointe Coupee, 1771to 1841. I noted that in such a small enclave of people inter marriage of families was common and expected. Thus I concluded that all my childhood friends were indeed related to each other, some close and many distantly but related.

Could be we all are related - distantly? Think about it,

"Tornadoes . . ."

We escaped a deadly bullet Tuesday. We were expecting rain and we got it but it came with some very violent Thunderstorms. In the past 10 years we have replaced two roofs and had two vehicles beat up by hail. This time we had about a half inch of rain, most of which fell in short order, then drizzled the rest of the day.

The TV guys took over the airwaves about 10 AM and stayed with it through about 3 PM. The first place to take a hit was the City of Cleburne, South of Fort Worth astride of I-35W. The Schnieder Truck dispatch yard took the first hit. Trucks were scattered, trailers crushed and pushed around but no one injured.

The next town was a little further East and still South of Fort Worth, Kennedale. Kennedale had a swarth a quarter of mile wide and 4.6 miles long. Most of the Tornadoes were EF-2s, maximum winds of 135 MPH in that town.

Further East and South of Dallas, the City of Forney took a big hit. Several storms rated as EF-3s, maximum winds of 165 MPH.

There were a total of 15 Tornadoes reported with 11 confirmed doing damage. There were more storms to the East of Dallas towards Tyler. And it went on into Louisiana and Arkansas. But the worst of it was here in the DFW complex.

The irony is that the next day, Wednesday, the sun shown clear and bright. Little wind, few clouds, just a nice Spring day. Yet over 300 structures were destroyed or damaged. Mobile homes to the brunt of the damages. There are photos of 2 X 4s embedded through walls of a house and in another house missing its second floor a bookshelve's contents in the kitchen exposed to the open went untouched or distrubed. Many stories of lost pets and survival in closets or in bath tubs. The upshot is no one was killed or even severely maimed.

We always need the water and the reservoirs are near capacity again. But we abhor the Spring storms, they are so violent and damaging. There were 15 reported Tornadoes, 11 of which did damage, 3 of which were EF-3 (maximum of 165 MPH) and 8 rated as EF-2 (maximum of 135 MPH).

With glory of Spring comes the horror of random destruction.